Saturday, May 26, 2018

-\|/- NEW Life -\|/-


I want to free my soul.
And let the life within me fly…
                Break this existence…

                                                And leave this world behind.

               

                When is it time? To weep for those who have died. I’m feeling all that sadness, when it’s welling up within me deep inside.

                This is the burden, she must carry.

And every month, must become wary…

                Weep, dear Martha for all lost souls.
                                Buried six feet under holes.

And remember them, at the very end.
                Of each month’s cycle.

                                The earth to mend.

When the ground becomes soft.
                To sop up her tears.
                                And soak the seeds we’ve sown for years.



I cradle this moment,
             This holy lament.
                                           Filling your hearts,
              With a distant scent.

To let new life into the world.
                A heavenly sound,
                                If ever be heard.
And she will awaken,
                After a small brief state,
                                Of warmth inside a sleeping crate.

To wipe the tears then from your eyes.
                A glimpse of dew in cornered size.

And behold the rainbow,
                And the sun.
And newly wrought creation sprung.

A tender leaf,
                A single stem,
                                But every One,
                For them.



~ CLynn

Friday, May 25, 2018

The Prince... and the Pauper...




I find it interesting... And I think you will agree. That there is an unfair advantage to those born into royalty... as compared with those who are born... in poverty.


For this... example... I use:

The Crown Prince of Dubai  . . . . . . . .   . . . . . . . .  . . . . . . . .  And a Simple Poor Boy. . .💖



















 


...BOTH are equally as handsome... 😍💞
And you know... the pauper is always the most humble... grateful,... and kind. 😏😊👑



~ 💗My Persian Prince 💗  -CLynn

Monday, May 21, 2018

A very Valid Reason...

......

                If it’s one thing, I have come to know over all of my time living alone… it’s that… I’m not the most dependable person in the world.
                In fact… I realize now… why former friends may have decided to not care, abandon me in my time of need, walk away, and focus on other things…
                But what of loyalty? Does it not have a say in this? I feel like, even if a friend isn’t always there for you, it’s not because they surely don’t want to be.
                And if you ask them, and they always say yes…. ?  Even if they don’t show up… does that not portray a measure of loyalty to you?

                I have tried… striven… always to be a loyal friend.

                But in the end they always choose to toss aside.

                In some ways, I would not blame them…
                                I’m not dependable. I’m only human.
                I get tired…
                I get weak…
                I get sick…

                                Surely… a Valid reason…

                Still…
                                To thrust someone aside for being undependable…
                                                Is like…
                                                                Throwing away a bag of potato chips… because one chip tasted funny.
Or
                Tossing away a whole bag of apples because one of them was bruised.

I would even go so far as to say,…
                It be like:                              Opening a discarded box you found on the side of the road that’s clearly heavy with goods… seeing one single broken bowel… and discarding the entire box… without so much as peeking at the rest inside…


                I feel as though… people only see the bad in me. Because that is their first impression. And clearly, I cannot change this.
                I miss one meeting, and I’m a self-centered boob who doesn’t give a damn. Without so much as seeing my side of the story!
               
                I’m also beginning to feel as though…
Being Alone + Being Poor = Suffering


                      No matter how hard I try…
                                                No matter how many times I push myself…
                It’s NEVER… Ever… Going to be enough…






















                



          But what most people DON’T realize… Is that there is a certain beauty to this darkness… when the dark does come upon us, and the moon rises amidst the debt of night.

                I have my flaws,. . .  as does all mankind…
                                But most will never know of the beauty of the night,… if they always choose to end their day before the sun sets.


~ CLynn ~





Monday, May 14, 2018

How The Government FUKS Us Over...



                                 Well... it's that time again... the time of year when Housing Comes around to make my life a living freiking flipping hell!!

               First I get a letter from them telling me, it's time to do their fkin anual review. So I do as the letter says:        Fill out the form to the best of my knowledge.
                           Get copies of all of my bank statements for the past six months
                         Get a copy of my recent benefit statement from SS.
                          Ect.

                  And they look me right in the eyes, and say. Ok that's it for now. Thank you.

            As if the yearly inspections weren't enough...

                             Then they send me this letter in the mail:       
           

              { In accordance with our annual exam... part of the process includes reviewing bank statements... Chapter 7 - Income:  Participants are required to submit a minimum of six (6) months bank statements during their annual exam.... Unexplained deposits into a participant's bank account may result in program violation and repayment or depending on large amounts, program discontinuation....  Upon reviewing the submitted bank statements, we discovered unexplained deposits... Please provide a written statement explaining the source of each deposit and submit any relevant documentation to support the deposit/explanation... please provide (additional) statements for the months of June 2017 through October 2017.... additionally... you did not submit documentation for this school semester. Participants are required to submit documentation for each semester attended to include proof of continued enrollment,... ect... Please provide the requested information by the deadline of June 15. Failure to respond to this notice and proved the requested information by the deadline will result in an incomplete annual exam and program discontinuation.}

Surely, they realize that if I were to be kicked from housing I would lose my apartment right?


             I only get  $675 /month!!        My rent here is actually $699/month. Without assistance, I would be evicted for sure.


And where could I go?

                   I have    $1.75  in that fkin bank account right now!

***$1.75!!***

my gas tank is getting fairely low... I might have enough gas to make it to only a few more places... I need to get water... I need to get more fkin statements... I have a doctor's appointment on the 21st!!!  (fkin doctor also screwing me over)... I need to go to the food pantry again this month or I will be eating rice and weeping again for lack of vitamins and minerals... how am I going to get all of that? Plus the semesters for college?!?

The college doesn't go by semesters. They go by modules. We are on the 5th module for this year. I'm on my 9th! How do you figure a module to a semester?

Those amounts are pretty small too! $6.00 measly dollars here... $20.00 dollars there... $5.00 dollars...?  And they are making a big deal of that!?!

How am I going to make the food pantry, my doctor's appointment, the bank, the pharmacy, housing, and get water with not much gas left?


?


I fkin HATE Housing!
every year they do this to me!!
F##%!

~ (X_x)💀🔪🚷🏢