Stormy Waters...

               I cannot help but feel that my bloggers ought to know...
                             Although, I look rich, although I have obtained many nice things... All of these things, have been gathered via hard work, sweat, tears, and fears.

                For example. The desk I had mentioned earlier?
                                       FREE! Given to me by the kind folks at the O.B.. Also, the nightstand as well. The other dresser was given to me by the groundskeeper (Manny - short for Man'juel) It was being thrown out by another apartment resident who was moving out. Same with the giant mirror. Even the sewing machine was a gift. *.*  When one of the older ladies at the OB found out I was interested in sewing, she offered it to me. It was just collecting dust in her garage, she said...
                  My point is...
                                                 I... had to repair, fix up, and clean the lot of the things I have presently obtained. By the graces of Jehovah God. (-_-)

                   So when I post to this blog the photos of these finished pieces, I sincerely hope that all will take this into consideration.

                 I am truly blessed.

               But... I'm still as poor... as when I came into this world.

         I... well I don't even want to talk about my financial woes at the moment. Let me just say, that this government is filled with evil GREEDY people! Who continually fleece the rich and the poor. Just like (Rev. 13:16-18) says. I kind of think that's what that number means. But I won't ever dare to speak of such things. As... I have seen with my own eyes, the dangers in doing so.
           In truth I wasn't exactly taught how to budget finances. I've had to kind of teach myself, as I go along. My dad was a horrible example. I remember times when he would try stealing from me, pawning off my things. (like video games, ect...) Just to pay bills that he'd neglected. Probably because beer was more important to him...

           Suffice to say. I'm not proud of it. And I have a lot of negative unlearning to do. And with my mother's inherited stubbornness, that won't be easy.

            But I also believe that Satan is doing his damnedest to discourage me from making any kind of spiritual advancement. I can see that, because whenever I start to make any kind of progress, it seems, something steals away my joy and peace of mind. Making me feel like a complete and total failiar.

             But I'm NOT! >_<      I'M NOT A FAILIAR!!         Not as long... as Jehovah is my God!!!
 And I will always love him. And wish to do what pleases him most. Even as I struggle to try to do so. And hurt inside. With imperfect human needs. Desires and chaotic emotions... I may always be tired. And easily exhausted. And sometimes sick. To my stomach or with depression.

            But I will never give up!

                                     And the harder it gets... the harder I MUST TRY!!
I MUST.
                      For I love my home. Which Jehovah has blessed to thee.

                                                                       ~ Crystal LM 🙏😇😠💗